KingJalopy

At recognizing fire hydrants…

What a dumb headline. Not sure why I’m surprised.

No offense but I wouldn’t pay $49 for that. Maybe $48.75, but not $49.

To me it looks like what I thought Macaulay Culkin would look like when he was older instead of what we got.

Are they so dumb They don’t realize that when we pause a video we are likely not watching or even near our fucking phone or screen at that time?

They are just mad because nobody wants to give them money to look at their feet.

Someone up there ^ found the original post but not the gender swapped version. But it’s still a made up dumb story.

Sounds gender fluid. And real.

But the outside part covers the inside and is the only part that goes inside. The inside is still inside while being inside your ear protecting the inside of your ear from the inside of the earbud.

Absolutely not, but one can recognize the others disinterest and be ok with that and one won’t stop to think you couldn’t possibly not be interested in them, or care really care wether you are or not because you should be. The latter obviously Clint the douche.

Or you could do the super smart cheat code way and eat waaay too many mushrooms one night thinking you can handle it, then get your ego absolutely fucking annihilated, realize you are actually one with the entirety of the universe and therefore actually just one with the girl you wanna talk to as all things are intrinsically entwined and you’ve finally achieved total absolute understanding of life and existence itself and hope you can explain it to her after it wears off with that same clarity without using the words “I’m literally inside you”.

Or so I hear…

Nah, when it comes to social shit like that, you just have not give a fuck what people think about you anymore, because honestly, they probably fucking aren’t. You’d have to be pretty egotistical to think so, and if you were, you’d probably be one of those douche bags that bothers girls who don’t want to talk to them.

I dunno, that was at least coherent if not incredibly dumb.

Shut up, Meg

Things I’ve never heard said before

I used to spend hours loading roms on my Nexus. Now I just spend hours removing Google from themselves

Ew. Goat fucker.

One time one of my friends got wasted and pissed in the hole of my guitar. True story. It was leaned on the wall and he awoke in a drunken stupor and thought it was the toilet. Miraculous part was how he managed to get most of the piss directly in the hole while simultaneously being drunk enough to confuse it for a toilet.

I have given rides to 2 different people to the ER when I drove for Uber. They were having heart attacks. One guy tipped me so I guess he made it after I dropped them off. Not sure about the other.

Good to be the favorite

Newpipe works fine for me. They always fix it almost immediately.